Worst Week In A Long, Long Time...

Last time I did say that I wouldn't write about myself now, but I did change my mind. So this week has been so depressing for me. Usually when things has been depressing for me, it have meant that my relationships and so on has go wrong. But now it's not that. Now it's other important things that would help me with my future. So let's start then...

First things first, I didn't get a job from Belfast. And I really did want that place. Everything did go smoothly, even my interviewer said to me that "you did great and you are my first pick". I was the ideal candidate, but surprise!!! In the end I didn't get the job. It hurts and badly. It was something that really wanted, I was so excited and now I'm down...

Second thing would be that yet again my thesis subject wasn't good enough for my teachers, without any valid reasons. So now I have start all over again with my thesis. And that will take time. Now it really looks like that cannot graduate even in spring. This sucks so much.

Then also I have already let my one friend down few times now, because my big mouth. I said too early that I might get a job from Belfast and she could get my flat from here when I would leave. And she really need new place and fast, so she was at both times so excited and happy about it. Now I did not get the job and she cannot get the flat. I did let her down and I hate it. Sometimes I am just too excited about things and I cannot keep my mouth shut. So people get hurt, now that happened...

Also I cannot get rid off from one very annoying girl. She is really harassing me with her text-messaging and she's trying to come same places than me. I have said to her that I'm not interested and leave me alone, but she's not even hearing those... Just keep trying harder and harder. I just cannot understand her. She has boyfriend and all. She should keep harassing him, not me... But on the other side, now I know how few my friends feel about me. With them, I have been too pushy and haven't realize that I'm for them annoying or the past. Why I couldn't see so oblivious things? I don't know, but now I know and I will give the ball for them. They know where I stand, so now they have to show me their stand. And I will accept their decision.

Now I really feel that I would need that partner who would hold me and said that everything will be alright. But unfortunately I don't have anyone, I have to survive by my own. Emotional guy in Finland... Not good at all, because in here guys cannot show any emotions or weaknesses... What a "nice" place we have here...

So all my plans has gone wrong and now I need to start from scratch. So next week will be a busy time for me. But now it really seems that I have to live this winter in Finland. If I survive this, I will survive anything. Fortunately I'm not alone... And in the end, I'm OK.

Let's close this post with a joke... Finnish guy was send to hell. While the devil was planning nice torture plan for the guy, the devil asked from the guy "Where are you from?". Guy answered "From Finland". Then the devil looked the guy in disbelieve and said "My God!!! Immediately take these three hot chicks and live like a king. You have suffered enough!"